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RELATIONSHIPS: Snooping

Let me start off by saying no matter what kind of relationship you have or are building, one of the core elements to all relationships is TRUST! Without trust it simply will not work. Point. Blank. PERIOD.


When a couple is together and one of the partners has any feeling that's the lines of trust have, or is beginning to become broken that is when another core element comes into play; COMMUNICATION. People feel the need to "snoop" to find out if in fact their partner has broken their trust.


•SIDEBAR: Last night I watched Blood Sweat and Heels. Which is what brought on this topic. The conversation the ladies from the cast had honestly did not surprise me in the least except one cast member. Demetria Lucas. I expected all of the ladies to say they snoop, but not Demetria. Which was a PLEASANT surprise.

No one in a healthy, and the keyword in this sentence is healthy. No one in an healthy relationship should have to snoop through their partners things to find out information. If those lines of trust are broken and you don't feel as if you can sit down and discuss it with your partner then that's a relationship you shouldn't be in. I am a firm believer in the goodness in people and that is sometimes my own personal downfall. You want to believe that everyone is good and doing good acts but all people don't.

•PERSONAL: I can speak from my own experiences that snooping may feel like the right thing to do at the time but it isn't. If you break it down you are snooping through the phone or email to find out information that you feel they are hiding, which is in fact exactly what you are doing. I was dating someone and I had a feeling they were cheating so I snooped through Facebook pages, text messages etc only to find the information I thought was true. It all boils down to trusting yourself enough to know that your not being paranoid and something about your relationship isn't right. We then want to confront our partner about our findings. Which is where we go wrong. The time to communicate is when you have the feeling so that snooping doesn't have to arise.

I just wanted to voice my opinion about the topic of "snooping" in a relationship. Don't take my perspective the wrong way thinking I don't understand why people snoop or why they feel the need or urge to. My point is that if you can't effectively communicate about the feelings and trust the outcome of that conversation with your partner you are in a situation that you aren't meant to be in anymore. That relationship is no longer right for you.


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